Healthy relationships 101
Prof. Grady and I are both people of strong opinions. Just to give you an idea, here's three things we've recently argued about:
- Is it rude to write email while talking on Skype. I think, emailing someone else is totally unacceptable. I mean, are you talking to me or what?! According to the professor, it is no big deal at all. It's not any different than doing the dishes or doing other seemingly innocent task while talking. ESPECIALLY, when you have a busy day ahead of you and really need to get stuff done as efficiently as possible.
- My explaining things by saying 'it's a Bulgarian thing' and insisting he won't understand. He really strongly dislikes me saying that. He's originally from California, has lived on the East Coast, survived Central Pennsylvania, got photographed in China and hiked in Mexico. He's only been to Bulgaria once and can count to 1000 and is actually moving here pretty soon. So...he adjusts pretty well. It's a Bulgarian thing definitely does not fly well with him.
- Whether he should wear a knit turtle-neck. Professor thinks: pretentous. Methinks: so sexy I can't even begin to tell you.
All three topics are still up for debate. I'm truly curious what you guys think.
- Is it rude to write email while talking on Skype. I think, emailing someone else is totally unacceptable. I mean, are you talking to me or what?! According to the professor, it is no big deal at all. It's not any different than doing the dishes or doing other seemingly innocent task while talking. ESPECIALLY, when you have a busy day ahead of you and really need to get stuff done as efficiently as possible.
- My explaining things by saying 'it's a Bulgarian thing' and insisting he won't understand. He really strongly dislikes me saying that. He's originally from California, has lived on the East Coast, survived Central Pennsylvania, got photographed in China and hiked in Mexico. He's only been to Bulgaria once and can count to 1000 and is actually moving here pretty soon. So...he adjusts pretty well. It's a Bulgarian thing definitely does not fly well with him.
- Whether he should wear a knit turtle-neck. Professor thinks: pretentous. Methinks: so sexy I can't even begin to tell you.
All three topics are still up for debate. I'm truly curious what you guys think.
15 Comments:
1. Totally unacceptable. But I generally live with the idea that I am the center of the world and noone would possibly even thing to gravitate away from it for a second - so I may be biased.
2. It's a Bulgarian thing, Kyle. Just accept it. Like the "lettuce + tomato = no" Bulgarian thing.
3. Actually, I can't even imagine it. So, undecided.
about first topic - i really don't like the idea of writing emails while talking.. no matter if it's Skype or regular talk with colleague/friend/anyone.. it's like trying to talk with two different people on different subjects simultaneously.. simply not working, thus - meaningful.
second one - 'it's a Bulgarian thing' will fly away with him only if you have enough free time to explain/demonstrate/show to him all the things, that makes you understand this particular sentence for yourself.. the fact, that he's not a Bulgarian just makes it complicated (but not impossible at all ;])
3rd one - why not? it's annoying only when you haven't shaved for couple of days :lol:
lettuce+tomato is damned delicious if you mix it with cucumbers, boiled+notched eggs, olives and squashed lemons+olive oil.. ;D
if you manage to get roquefort in a separate plate and some red wine too, you'll know what i'm sayin' (;
1. I think it depends on what kind of conversation you're having. With some topics (many, actually), writing an email on the side is totally acceptable :P
2. Although you lived in the States for 7 years, I think he could still pull the "It's a Californian thing" :)
Although, somehow, I don't think that would bother you as much. Some things are better left unexplained...
3. Mmmmm, totally sexy. Nothing sexier.
1. I don't have the ability to chew gum and walk, much less type an e-mail while talking on the phone. So I'm fascinated by people who are able to do this type of next-level multi-tasking...
2. I see where he's coming from on this one, and agree with Kiddo. Writing off his difficulty understanding something as "oh, it's a bulgarian thing" essentially puts ever understanding WHY something is the way it is in Bulgaria out of his reach.
3. While I totally understand his view here, his distaste for turtlenecks shouldn't matter. There's no argument-- if you think it makes him look sexy, he should have one in every color. Bottom line.
hmm... funny, that one.
1. i wouldn't do it. while washing the dishes is a task i can do without my mind being on it, both talking and writing meaningful sentences require me to think. and while i believe i can multi-task pertty well, i would find it offensive if the other person does it, so i am not inclined to do it myself.
2. well, some things are bulgarian. or maybe you could say "balkan / slavic" (i haven't had a case of having to explain "a bulgarian thing" to a macedonian...) then again, most of those things have logical explanations too. therefore, to me, "it's a bulgarian thing" is perfectly acceptable, if you are willing to think and explain why bulgarians do ti that way. :)
3. you think it's sexy? fine, wear one. for me, it's uncomfortable, so i would refuse :) maybe that's a male thing, now... (of course, not liking to shave probably has something to do with it too)
1. No to the e-mail thing. There is such a difference between, say, washing the dishes while on the phone, and talking to someone else, because you can tell that the person is only half listening, which is pretty rude. I mean, if you were talking to them face-to-face they wouldn't be having a completely different conversation with someone else at the same time, so what makes talking on the phone different!
2. Go for it!
3. Pretentious, and they remind me of those movies I had to watch in high-school biology with the man in the turtleneck and the yellow jacket. They were made in the '70s or something, and so not sexy.
hehehe...you guys are funny! :D
Knit Turtle Necks are completely luscious!! But we always shared similar fashion sense. ;)
topher! do you remember that one time you showed up at FIJI wearing a pair of black toxedo pants and a feather boa?! good times, good times!!!
Wow, look at the controversy! I don't know why everyone objects to the email thing. I'm chatting on icq, watching a movie, talking on skype and my cellphone, and typing up my lecture notes for Monday all while posting this comment. As for the turtleneck thing, what can I say? As the comments posted here suggest, this is clearly an American thing. ;)
yep, this kind of multi-level non-stop communication, involving several IM-programs, cell/regular phone, emails amd so on and so forth, is quite well known, especially while working..
despite of that, i still don't like to talk with somebody, while writing an email. i mean simultaneously.
Oh gosh--YES!! How outrageous that was! :) Good times indeed.
talkin' while mailin'...
there was that woman who once wrote "we, who had so much space and so little time, we became nomads" (i don't think the quote is exact , but generally it says the same). Kenneth White put it in the very beginning of his "Blue Road".
so, it is our innate nomadic nature, a state being so aggravated by the dynamics of what is now called les temps modernes, and worsened by the end-of-the-century syndrome which didn't spare any of us.
i am not talking lost generations here.
i am talking about this acute sense of lack of time and the constant desire to live the most of every piece of time, that forces us to do so many things at one at the same time... talking while writing an e-mail?
jeez, then what about gong to work while on drugs, lunch meetings that have to work as dinners, smoking while having sex, reading while eating, sleeping 3 hours a night? It's just an evolutionary thing - doing (at least) two things simultaneously doesn't mean that you're not a 100 per cent into any of them. It just means you're saving moments. Or living moments. Or whatever.
It's a Bulgarian thing. Most likely, Spanish, British or Venezuelan also.
reading through your comments, i have decided that:
1. i can definitely live with the email thing. because, honestly, i multi-task myself. all the time. no need to go into details. check out unIDfied [hi, there!] comment, for refernces.
2. Prog. Grady sooo needs to try on a turtle-neck. Only after he moves to Bulgaria, of course! :)
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