Ае к'во толкова?!

Earlier this evening, at a dinner with Var and Vlado, I was reminded of something that Var told me several months ago, not too long after I had started working for my current employer. It had been a tough day at the office. I was post-conference-call and down and out and teary-eyed and generally disappointed with myself and humanity and doubting that I could ever become good at what I do...like EVER. There I was, sitting in my chair, feeling small and insignificant and totally incompetent, when Var pulled me over and said,

Whatever! Don't worry about this! [In Bulgarian: Ае к'во толкова?! Я не се ядоствай"]

I didn't respond. Just stared and sniffed and tried to clear the runny mascara off my face. It turns out that this one simple exchange has pretty much proven to be the key to my sanity and, dare I say, to my professional happiness.

Now, of course, I'm only speaking for myself here, but I've realized that, especially at work, I seem to inflate the importance of my immediate tasks. Things get bigger and bigger and bigger, at least in my own mind. The more significant my task appears to my own crazy self, the better I feel about being responsible for completing it. Thus plans become STRATEGIES and conversations become MEETINGS and updates become REPORTS...you get the idea. I think this is natural and we all do it to various degrees. We just need to feel good about whatever it is that we do. We like to think that nobody else can do it as well as we do. We want to believe we are indispensable. Being a part of a corporate structure definitely contributes some as well.

That, in itself, is not so bad, I don't think. It makes you work harder and take a more personal interest in whatever it is that you do and that's always good. The reason why I mention it here is because I think this kind of unrealistic valuation of how significant one's work is, can be very harmful as well. The more highly you think of your job, the more disappointed you are when you are not 100% successful in completing your projects. The higher priority you give to your responsibilities, the harder it becomes to value other people's work. The more you see yourself as a key member of a team, the less you are able to appreciate what others contribute to projects.

That's why Var's advice is so right-on. If you don't take your work super seriously, you don't run the risk of setting yourself up for failure. Instead, you focus on getting things done and enjoying the process as you go along. Following Var's advice, I must say I have been less stressed out and significantly happier at work. And, although I realize I am being totally subjective about it, I think I've become more productive. I think I just had this finite amount of energy in myself and by not worrying too much about the significance of all the emailing that I send out each day, I simply started sending better emails.

I am writing about this here because when you think about it, it's just this one little thing that someone told me but still, it has made a huge difference to how I experience my work every day and I feel extremely lucky to have heard that so early on. Also, I was wondering if you guys would be willing to share similarly simple tips you received at work that seem to have helped you de-stress and instead focus on enjoying whatever it is that you do.