Our Wedding-Wedding

The night before our wedding, we stayed up waaay later than we should have. We also consumed way more alcohol than necessary. So, the morning OF the wedding, we felt just as fresh as dill pickles. But we did get out of bed and before I knew it, I was having bobby pins nailed into my head. I spend the day thinking I was a walking fire-hazard with the amount of hairspray worked into my bridal style.

Prof. Grady and I both suffered minor heart-attacks at the reception room of our church as we realized we had forgotten to bring our civil marriage certificate, which had seemed like the only real prerequisite for being able to marry into the Christian Orthodox church. The priests were scary at first but then understanding and agreed to follow through with the ceremony. Pheew!

During the ceremony:

P: I am sweating like a pig.
K: Me too.
Priest: Kiss the cross and say Amen.

We had three priests perform the ceremony. One was stern, one was sweet and one had the most beautiful voice but did not seem to give a shit. The choir was so fantastic, our guests bet money on whether it was a recording or not.

We walked out and our guests just stood there, mostly stupefied, not knowing what to say or do...intermingled with another wedding party...of German-speakers...and stray dogs...and so many pigeons...Our photographer got a huge kick out of it all.

We took photos ON the tram line by the little produce market where street vendors hustled my husband into kissing me and offered us beers and yelled OHMYGODTHEBRIDE!!!!!! as the next tram came down the street and they worried we would get run over. Like I said, the photographer got a huge kick out of it. He also made us walk all the way to the National Theater and took photos on the way...kids dropping their ice-cream cones while watching Kyle and I, together with our KUMOVE, take high jumps off the fountains.

Our reception was at MOTTO, a place we've always liked, but now LOVE...for its beautiful garden and delicious food and wonderful, wonderful staff who greeted our guests with glasses of Italian sparkling wine but also saved a bottle for just the two of us because they thought we would need it the most. We exchanged vows in both English and Bulgarian and, I must say, doing that was the most romantic thing I've ever experienced. It was something we always wanted to do, but I did not realize how much I really meant all those words and how much I wanted to actually say it in front of our closest friends and families. It was just magic.

What followed was a night of good food and better music and, really, the best people in the entire world. It was sweet and, ok, a little sappy at times. But mostly just really really FUN. No strange rituals. No chicken dances. No MACARENA. Just love and romance and hugs and kisses everywhere. Also, little flower girls spilling red wine all over their white dresses, and grandmas drinking beer out of BIG glasses, and toasts that made everyone tear up a little bit and then laugh, like, A LOT.

I was amazed by the ability of people to reach across cultural and language barriers:

- My grandma spent the entire evening hanging out with Kyle's sister Ellie, the conversation culminating with the two of them taking a picture of their tired feet: Ellie in her silver Manolo's and Grandma, in her brand-new flat Dr. Scholl's.

- Kyle's mom and my grandpa bonding over their appreciation for mastika.

- 4 parents dancing the horo to Madonna's Like a Prayer.

- Ina's boyfriend, Mike, seating people and then getting them all gather up for our first dance...and for the throwing of the bouquet...and for the cake.

- Kyle's dad giving a small lesson in skateboarding history during his toast at the reception

- Watching my mom drag my friend Cristi into the toilet and attempting to stick her finger in her mouth. See, mom thought that Cristi was drunk and, being the true problem-solver that she is, wanted to help her throw up. The thing was...Cristi was not drunk. She simply had the flu.

***

We had been so tired and busy the week leading up to the wedding, that we had started worrying we wouldn't be able to enjoy it. But we did. I am so happy we had fun at our own wedding. But, I am the most happy that somewhere between the dinners, and errands, and bad bouquets, and the constant going back and forth between English and Bulgarian, and the music, and the seating charts, and the crosses and the crowns, and the first, and second and third dances, and the I-love-you's and the pigeons and the rice, and the tired feet and the big entrances, and the small breakdowns...I fell in love with my husband, all over again.

And, to me, my friends, that makes the whole thing all worthwhile.

:)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

Wedding Tour

A little while ago Ve-li asked whether I thought the wedding day is the most important day in a girl's life. I am not sure if I can answer this question because, as it turns out, prof. Grady and I have not been able to limit ourselves to a single day. We had our civil ceremony back in December and we are having our church ceremony and reception this coming Saturday. However, in between, there have been dinners and drinks commemorating the occasion. And, most recently, we've started what we now refer to our "Wedding Tour".

The first small group of family came over last week from the States. My sister Ina and her boyfriend Mike arrived from Germany over the weekend. Our friend Ashley flew in from Paris earlier today, Kyle's dad is flying in from San Fransisco tomorrow and so is Cristi, from Miami; Brooke will be joining us, fresh out of Siberia, on Thursday. What will follow is a week of more dinners, lunches, coffee-and-cakes, travel to Plovdiv, back and beyond.

It's been kinda crazy and in the meantime we've needed to finalize arrangements with the florist, the DJ and the printers. We also managed to squeeze in a little weekend trip to Istanbul.







People say that you don't marry a person, you marry a family and I always thought that was interesting but didn't quite get it. Now I know that it is true. And, that is more fun than I could have ever imagined. There are hugs and stories and new inside jokes we all get to laugh about...and things we collectively roll our eyes at. And shared taxi rides. And rude waiters we get to cuss off. And missed flights. And scary customs officials. And pretty views and mint lemonade. And the occasional leave-me-alone and i-love-you's...all the time...Mostly, I am surprised how real it all feels.

And, it almost feels scary to say it, but I am feeling that today I am really just having it all...

Beer and Bach

The first time I went to a party in the States I took a long time to get ready. I dressed up and did my hair and make-up. Wore heels and made sure I smelled nice. I was taken to a frat party, where everyone kept asking why I was so dressed up. I was so confused that I couldn't even fake a decent response. I later learned that college kids in the States, unless the situation demands otherwise, prefer to be comfortable and casual to dressed-up. Any time.

I will always remember that sense of sheer confusion and stupor I experienced as I walked through the doors of the frat house. It felt like I was in a movie and it was only a matter of seconds before the fat foreign kid threw up on my red pumps. I also thought it was pretty damn funny and promptly entered the bathroom to laugh it all off and compose myself.

The reason why I am bringing this up now is a K-G outing that took place last night and produced a very similar combo of confusion, stupor and delight at the total randomness of the event. See, we read about the Herbert von Karajan festival a little while back and were very much looking forward to enjoying the Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra LIVE in Sofia. I mean, it was going to be a MAJOR event in the middle of what’s been a mostly peasant summer (all social activities have been limited to consuming massive amounts of food or liquor or, most often, both). It was our chance to do something that required a little more brain, something cultural…something that would make us feel less like we live in Europe’s underbelly (hate Churchill for saying that about the Balkans, by the way) and more like we inhabit a vibrant European city that I hope Sofia will become some time soon. So, we planned for weeks and then last night got a little dressed up and grabbed food and drinks and hurried to the garden of the National Theater…to find out that there was no orchestra in sight. Only a big-ass video-screen. Airing Mtel commercials between classical acts.

OK, OK…had we thought a little bit about it, we would have figured it out earlier. I mean…Mr. Karajan’s been dead for many years now (RIP) and the announcement did mention that the Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra would be conduced by him, so we should have guessed there were no way in hell that it could all happen LIVE. But come on, people, the organizers could have done a slightly better job at providing clear information on what exactly it was that they were trying to do. For one, I wouldn’t have worn the world’s most uncomfortable pants and would have sported jeans instead.

All confusion and mild embarrassment aside, however, it was an awesome evening. The selection of pieces played was amazing and the sound was surprisingly good. Also, the combination of classical music with the super low-key venue was fantastic. Felt super relaxing and romantic and summery and we didn’t feel completely out of place with our sandwiches and cheap beer in hand.

They are showing Vivaldi’s Four Seasons tonight, which always reminds me of airline commercials, but we might be going again. Nothing can make a falafel taste better than a little bit of violin in the background.

Surprise!!!

I wanted to surprise Kyle and take him go-cart racing today. He was surprised alright. Mostly, by the tropical storm that started JUST as we set foot at the race track. Ah well...what is one to do...We raided the vending machine and, in true Kirilova-Grady fashion, took pictures instead.







When the rain stopped, we came home.

Bees on my mind

Several months ago, prof. Grady alerted me to a terrible thing happening to bees worldwide. It’s referred to “colony collapse disorder” and refers to the sudden disappearance of huge numbers of bee colonies at numerous locations throughout the world. That’s sad but also very very dangerous, given the vital role that bees play as pollinators. So, I’ve been keeping an eye out for bee-related pieces in the publications I read and have grown increasingly fascinated with the subject:

- There are twenty thousand kinds of bees that have been identified throughout the world.
- Different kinds of bees have different personalities. Italians are very laid back but sometimes can’t produce enough honey to last them through the winter. Russians take the longest to build up a colony but once they do, they are the most likely to sustain it.
- Bees are the only biological species besides humans that communicates via representational language. They dance to signal food location!!!
- When a queen bee lays an egg, she can choose its sex.
- Male bees have only reproductive functions and are killed by the workers as soon as they are done performing them.

There are still no conclusive theories on what’s causing colony collapse disorder, but possible reasons include: disease, pollution, cell phones… Here are several links to more comprehensive pieces on the subject:

- Stung: Where have all the bees gone? by Elizabeth Kolbert for The New Yorker (all of the facts about bees above were taken from that piece)
- Who killed the honeybees? by Kevin Berger for Salon.com
- Honeybees Vanish, Leaving Keepers in Peril by Alexei Barrionuevo for The New York Times

Strange things have been happening these days, don’t you think?

Good things recently. Many of them: somewhat wedding related

1. Playing The Simpsons Movie trivia with Prof. Grady, falling asleep covered in laughter.
Prof. Grady: What did Marge do when she dashed back in when their house was set on fire?
Petya: Picked up their wedding video and finished washing a dish.

2. Writing our wedding script over french fries at a café on Vitoshka.

3. Kissing my husband on his back, between his shoulder blades.

4. Noticing a small defect on my wedding dress and realizing I still have plenty of time to have it fixed. Kyle’s reaction: Now it’s the time to go Bridezilla on their ass!!!

5. Realizing how calm we both are about the whole wedding enterprise and really, just looking forward to spending a beautiful day with our friends.