Life lessons from 2007

I saw this at my new online friend Nicodile’s blog and loved the idea so much that decided to do it myself.

January: It's hard to live on two continents.
Ask my husband. For a couple of months there he had the longest commute ever. Sofia-Philly 7726 km.

February: People are very curious about sex.
And are not embarrassed to talk about it. On this very blog, we discussed the advantages of mint-flavored condoms and giving blow-jobs after having crunched an altoid.

March: Love knows no boundaries.
Again, proven by my husband. Who jumped on a plane and moved to mother-fuckin’ Bulgaria. Just to be with me. What can I say, I’m lucky.

April: It takes a village.
Like Hillary says, it takes a village to raise a child. In other words, to achieve great success, you need to learn to ask for help and rely on those around you. Said lesson was put into to practice as soon as we started applying for Kyle’s Bulgarian residence permit. I blogged about it and as a result have made a great number of friends who, to quote my favorite Tyra Banks, are still in the running towards becoming Bulgarian residents.

May: If you believe in what you do, other people will believe in what you do. And vice versa.
In May, a couple of lovely people from Orbitel contacted us with a job. It was about something that neither myself nor the professor had done before. But we thought, heck, if they think we can do it, we can probably do it. Which we did. And we have been working together ever since. Sometimes all you need is a person to believe in you. In our case, we had an entire department.

June: When moving, don’t move to a better apartment. Move to a good apartment.
Which we learned the hard way, naturally. There were things about our previous apartment that we hated. So we decided to look for a new one. We found one and thought, Oh, wow! It’s so much better than the old one! and we signed the lease without thinking twice. Needless to say, as soon as we moved in, we realized it was definitely a better apartment than the old one. But also noticed that it was not a good apartment by any stretch of the imagination.

July: You don’t need a wedding planner to plan a wedding.
You need a bride. A groom. And wordpress.

August: Your wedding is probably not the best day of your life.
But sure as hell, it is tuns of fun.

September: Life is what happens when your plans fall through.
We had very ambitious honeymoon plans. We planned to pull a Johnny Cash and by the end of it be able to say, I’ve been everywhere, man! Instead, we ended up being stuck in Philly and having a blast.

October: Just do it.
My friend Bogdana felt like she couldn’t find a good women’s magazine to read. So she started her own.

November: Take control of your finances.
Which is a lesson I have taken to heart and have made significant progress on. The first step was to decide I want to do it. The second: to start tracking my expenses. My next step: put together a budget. I’ll keep you posted how things go…but so far…it’s been illuminating.

December: When in Rome…(do as the Romans do)
On December 6, my husband celebrated his first Bulgarian name-day ever. He did not eat fish, as he is vegetarian, but he made sure enough rakia was consumed.

Celebrity babies

So...hmmm...today I learned that Jennifer Lopez just gave birth to a boy and a girl. And then I read that Jessica Alba is pregnant with twins. And then I found myself trying to conduct a mental count of all celebrities with twins: P'Diddy, Julia Roberts, Marcia Cross...And now I'm just left sitting at my desk all confused and wondering...

...is this normal?!

Roman Holiday

It really was just lovely.



P.S. My molto picolla bag made it back home safely. Thank you for your concern.

Flying low-cost

On our way back from Italy, Prof. Grady suggested that I do not check my bag but I wouldn't listen. When I got to the check-in counter, the guy at the desk insisted that my bag was really molto picolla and I should just take it with me on board but I wouldn't listen. When we arrived in Sofia, the bag was not there. Guh-reat.

The bag didn't come on Sunday. It wasn't here Monday. I waited for it all day today (Tuesday). It didn't arrive.

So, I called the airport:

Me: Bongiorno. I am still missing a molto picolla bag that was supposed to land in Sofia with me on Sunday. It's Tuesday and I don't have it and was wonde...
Sofia Airport Rep: Your reference number?
Me: t27970w
Sofia Airport Rep: Your bag has been here since Sunday evening.
Me: Oh!
Sofia Airport Rep: How come?
Me: Oh!
Sofia Airport Rep: Your bag should have been delivered on Sunday evening.
Me: Oh...well...hmmmm
Sofia Airport Rep: Why has your bag not been delivered until now?!
Me: Sir, I mean...Hmmmppf
Sofia Airport Rep: Well, hopefully you'll have it delivered tomorrow. If you don't have it tomorrow, call us again.
Me: ....

There's a fine line between independence and stubbornness. Listen to whatever advice people try to give you. Sometimes, they might just be right.

K-G Travel Notes

When we travel, I admit it, Kyle does most of the planning. And by most, I really just mean all. I kind of just...you know...plan to attend. I let him pick hotels and come up with itenararies because I just know he's going to take me on the most amazing adventure ever. He always does.

When we decided to go to Rome I said no, it's not fair. I will help with the plans too. So in order to prepare, I downloaded a documentary series on Roman history, read bits and pieces about Roma in our travel guidebook and actually bothered to learn how to say good morning in Italian.

Rome was breath-taking.

And inspiring. And joyful. And friendly. And educational. And relaxing. And so fucking romantic. And so nostalgic at times. And home to the best coffee my lips have ever come in contact with. For real!

I am not sure if it was the city, the wine, or my husband's kisses...but I felt like I could have stayed forever...Which, of course, I couldn't do. But one thing is for sure...the K-G's are definitely going back.

Pictures will follow.

Yea team

Our boss was on the Bulgarian version of Who Wants to be a Millionaire and we put together a team of Netagers to help him out in the competition.

We practiced for a while last night. He would call and pretend to be the show hosts and then pretend to be himself under pressure and then ask us questions and then we would try to find the answer online. We split up in groups. At each computer station we positioned two people: one to do the actual searching and one to help them browse through search results. We pushed the desks together and cranked up the volume on the speaker phone and appointed a timer. We came up with search strategies, which I am not giving away. We then agreed to meet up at 9AM and be ready to take calls from the show.

At around 10 AM this morning we got the call. We were asked a 100,000 leva question: Which actor collaborated with Oasis on their Be There Now video? We found the correct answer in just under 10 seconds. It was Johnny Depp. Everyone was screaming with excitement and I thought the roof was going to fall in on us. Too bad that Boss had already made a mistake on the question and they were only calling to see if our “brain-trust” would work. Of course it would.

...

Who cares about winning massive amounts of money on a silly TV show when you can have so much fun losing it with the full support of your own firm?! Yea team.

You asked: Part 7

Question: Where the hell have you been?!

Well, thank you all for asking. I’ve missed you too. Here’s what happened: I started a feminist blog in Bulgarian. And all hell broke loose.

I dared to suggest, among other things, that:
- even though men and women might be equal in the face of the law, there are still actual inequalities that take the form of gender stereotypes and prejudices that need to be addressed
- sexist and racist jokes are not funny
- female managers face different sorts of expectations from their employees than male managers and backed that up with a scientific study

Radical and revolutionary, no?

The blog got TONS of attention and for the most part, it’s been a good experience. I find it refreshing to have my core values challenged…like…when I needed to explain why I don’t think a woman can only feel fulfilled when she has a husband and a child. Or when I had to figure out the polite way to say FUCK OFF to people who believe that women are almost inevitably worse managers than men. I feel like I’m back in my Intro to Gender Studies class way back when…only that I am the one doing the explaining.

I find Bulgarian attitudes toward feminism totally fascinating. Back in the 40s, communists declared us all equal and thus considered the “women issue” resolved. Women could work and prosper together with men. They opened state-run childcare centers, paid for extended maternity leave and encouraged women to pursue traditionally male occupations. Somewhere along the way, however, something seems to have not quite clicked. Because, from what I see now, women here don’t think highly of themselves and men…ah men. I would really hope that you guys would help me figure this out…

But…what do you know…I plan to persevere. I emailed my political theory professor from grad school, the virtual equivalent of throwing my hands up in desperation, and she said to me, Yes! Sometimes what seems hopeless (and endless) is what most needs doing!

Thank you all for sticking around.